This is NOT Mine
by TheNextAliceOwO
Summary: Okay, unless I got this whole biology thing wrong, I'm pretty sure I had more... Chest." When Kuukai and Amu accidentally switch bodies, what happens? Rated T for everything from jealousy, to times of the months, to annoying fangirls/boys.
1. Chapter 1

_**A/N:**_ I was actually supposed to do this a long time ago (I'm talking 3 months) but procrastination told me that there are cookies nearby xD

Either way, let's catch up before the story starts 0.~

Ahem:

Amu= 7th grade with everyone else (except Yaya, she's in 6th grade)

Kuukai=8th grade

_Miru no Tamago_~Miru's Egg= The heart's egg of a girl who died of cancer many years ago. It is said that if two people of the opposite gender touch it, they will fall in love. If only one person touches it, it's the same as the embryo.

OKAY x3 Let's go!

--

Kuukai's stomach growled. _Damn. It wasn't a good idea to skip breakfast…_ Right at that moment, a pinkette walked by with a granola bar.

"Hinamori! Perfect timing!" the boy was by her side at the blink of an eye.

_HOLY SHIT!_ Amu jerked back.

She coughed to clear away her surprise. "What?"

"You know, today's my birthday," Kuukai lied. "And I just happen to _love_ granola bars."

"You're birthday was a month ago," Amu said, taking a bite out of her granola bar.

"Uh… Well, today's _your_ birthday! And it just so happens that you should've brought… Goodie bags?"

Amu sighed. "Sorry, but I'm extremely hungry because I skipped breakfast."

The school bell rang and students rushed to their classes.

"You are going to give me that granola bar…" Kuukai said.

"I have to go to class! I don't have time for this!" Amu started to walk quickly down the marble hallway and past the seemingly endless rows of lockers.

Kuukai grabbed her wrist. A normal passerby would've thought of those romantic anime moments where the guy is like, "Stop!" and something romantically awesome happens. But this is a fight for a granola bar.

"Kuukai," Amu glared at him. "Let go of my arm _now_."

"Why should I?" he teased.

"Because I'm going to be late for class!" Amu complained. _And this feels very _very _awkward for some reason._

"Then not until you give me that granola bar," Kuukai said.

--

Inside her homeroom, Rima was just watching as the teacher wrote down something on the white board and thinking about the latest comedy she watched when she heard a banging noise.

"_What_ is the meaning of this?!" the teacher put down the marker rather angrily and marched to the door. That was the queue for all the students to rush to the door to see what was happening.

Rima, being lucky enough to have a front row seat to the action turned the cold door knob.

The students stared at the sight of a brown haired 8th grader that had pinned down their beloved pinkette. This was going to start a huge misunderstanding. Nearby, a granola bar was still, feeling unloved.

"Souma-san," the teacher started. "What are you doing?"

"Uhh…" Kuukai paused. "Wrestling?"

--

The bell for lunch rang and countless students started a stampede down the marble hall that could've rivaled with an elephant stampede.

However, Hinamori Amu was at the head of the herd, I mean group. O.o

She arrived at Kuukai. He smiled.

"Hinamori! What's up?"

Amu raised up a textbook weighing about… 8 pounds?

"_AMU CHOP!_" the textbook met Kuukai's skull very painfully.

"WHAT WAS THAT FOR?!"

Amu glared at him. "What do you think?! Because of you, everyone has been telling me that I'm a fucking whore!"

"What?" Kuukai said. He raised a fist defensively. "Who's the idiot who said that?"

Amu crossed her arms. "Your fangirls, no duh. Why? BECAUSE YOU FRIGGIN' PINNED ME DOWN!"

A tired Rima was running toward Amu. "Amu-chan, next time could you wait for me?" She started patting down her long blonde hair.

"Oh, sorry," Amu said, calming down a bit.

"Sorry," Kuukai muttered.

"You should be."

Kuukai looked up, suddenly cheerful again. "Does someone need a hug?"

Amu stared at him. "No, I don't need a hug."

"Yes you do."

"No I don't."

"Come 'ere!"

"NO!"

Kuukai gave Amu a big hug and her face turned as red as a tomato.

"Can you let go now?"

"Oh, right."

Rima giggled. "Can we just go to lunch?"

Amu could only nod as a response, she was still flustered from the hug.

--

Amu stretched as she got out of her seat. _Thank god, I can't take anymore of this Pre-Algebra thing_. She and Rima headed to their lockers and put away whatever and junk.

_I'M SINGING IN THE RAIN~_ Rima picked up her cell phone. "_Moshi moshi?"_ There was a pause. "_Hai_. I'll be right there." Rima hung up.

"Who was that?" Amu asked.

"My mom, she said she's at the entrance," Rima said, taking off in another direction. "_Ja ne!_"

Amu waved and turned around, almost immediately colliding into Kuukai.

"Woah! What do you want?" Amu said, quite alarmed.

"Uh… As an apology for…" Kuukai stuttered. "Yeah… I'll just walk you home."

Amu smiled, trying to hide the redness that might've formed on her face. "Thanks."

They walked out to the crosswalk where they met Yaya and their Shugo Charas, who had spent the day playing at the clubhouse.

"Amu-chi!" Yaya pulled Amu into a big hug. "I haven't seen you in such a long time! The new guardians are so boring!" Yaya turned around to see 3 younger students staring at her. "No offense." Yaya finally let go of Amu and analyzed her for a while. "Wow! You really have changed since I last saw you! I mean, you got taller! Your hair grew a little bit… Oh, and the guys _have_ to like that chest development," Yaya giggled.

"YAYA! WHAT THE FUCK?!" Amu said, covering her chest. Yaya giggled hysterically. "How old are you anyway?!"

Amu glanced at Kuukai. "What are you looking at?"

Kuukai's face turned bright red. He coughed. "Nothing."

Yaya broke into hysterical laughter… Again.

Ran, Miki, Su, and Pepe linked arms and swayed back and forth, singing something along the lines of "Kuukai's a perv~!" Meanwhile, Daichi walked, or floated, over to him and put a hand on his shoulder, "It's time we have 'the talk.'"

"WHAT THE FUCK?!" Kuukai exclaimed, while Amu was still wondering what was happening.

Suddenly, they heard the sound of a violin, some of the students from school passed out and X-eggs came from their hearts.

"Not again!"

~half an hour later~ (Sorry for the skip)

Yaya, Amu, and Kuukai (already in their character transformations) looked up.

"There it is!" Yaya pointed at a sparkling pink egg in the sky. "_Miru no Tamago!_"

"Ah!" Amu lept up to get it on her _magical_ rollerblades.

"No!" Ikuto used his awesome cat powers and lept up as well. (I 3 Kitties)

Kuukai suddenly felt trouble. If the rumors about the egg were true then…

Suddenly, out of pure instinct, Kuukai jumped up on his skateboard and went after the egg.

Meanwhile, Yaya got distracted by a nearby donut store. But you can't blame her, who doesn't love donuts?

--

"AHHHHH!" Amu and Kuukai's scream mixed and started a stampede in Africa.

"What's wrong?" Yaya said, munching on a donut from a huge box in her left hand.

"We touched _Miru no Tamago_ at the same time!" Amu paniced, she started flailing her arms frantically. Ran held the egg above her head.

Yaya sighed and took one bite of her donut. "Do you guys feel a sudden urge to 'do it' with each other?"

"What the fuck?" Kuukai jerked back. "Hell no!" In fact, he felt the same about her as he always has (If you knows what I mean x3)

"Okay then we're good!" Yaya stretched. She then reached out to a distraught Amu. "Have a donut."

--

_**A/N:**_ YAY SOOPER LONG CHAPPY x3

Thx 4 reading! R&R if you want another chapter xD

Quick warning: Next chapter will have stuff not suitable for children o.o You can kinda guess where this is going…

UPDATE: AHAHA I forgot to mention that there was a Soul Eater reference in there x3 any Soul Eater fans in the crowd?


	2. Chapter 2

_**A/N:**_ HIYA GUYS x3 okayz rite now I'm multi-tasking (HW _and_ writing at the same time xD) SO BE THANKFUL X3

ShugoCharaDoki: Ty very much x3 I intend 2 make it as funny as possible

Miss Aya-chan 14: Ty xP

Natsuya801923: The granola bar was inspired by my friends because they were arm wrestling for it xD the donut thing to, because my other friend was like "Have a donut" to the loser xD

Sierraphantom: Thx x3

S Chang: Thx =D I love making people laugh xD

Namo-senpai: ty ^^

xNorix: Wo0t xD Soul Eater fans UNITE xP ty

: ty x3

--

"Amu-chan!" Kuukai heard Ran's voice that morning. "Wake up!"

Kuukai got up clumsily. He felt weird… His eyes widened at the sight of a really girly bedroom.

"What the-"

"Amu-chan! You got to get ready for school!" Suu tried to pull Kuukai out of bed.

"What're you talking about? I'm Kuukai!" Kuukai said.

Miki giggled. "You're so funny, Amu-chan!"

"What the-?" Kuukai stared at them for a moment.

"Wait a minute," Ran said.

"Don't tell me…?" Miki gasped.

--

Amu got up and stretched and noticed something right away.

She felt her chest. _Oh my god, they're gone!_ She felt her head. _My beautiful hair!_ Then her hand trailed downward… _WTF IS THIS?!_

Daichi woke up and rubbed his eyes. "_Ohayo_…"

"DAICHI!" Amu grabbed the little shugo chara. "WHO DO I LOOK LIKE TO YOU?!"

Daichi starred at her strangely. "Kuukai? Are you okay?"

Amu gasped. _Oh my god, I'm Kuukai!_

--

"Amu-chan! There's a boy here for you!" Amu's mother called.

"BOY?!" Amu's father started crying rivers in the kitchen. Like, those rivers that people canoe in.

"Can you send him to my room?" a girl's voice called.

--

Amu turned the doorknob of her own room and entered. She saw herself, still in pjs and everything.

The pink-haired girl ran toward her. "I'M A FUCKING GIRL!!!"

"You think you've had it bad? I have an extra part! Do you know how bad that is?!" Amu screamed back.

(_**A/N: **_Okay, this might get confusing… So when I say Amu, I mean the REAL Amu, when I say Kuukai, I mean the REAL Kuukai. They're just in the opposite bodies. Kay?)

Kuukai paused for a minute. "You know, bras feel kinda weird."

"PERV!" Amu felt like slapping him, but he was in her body… So that would be painful. Wow, that sounded weird coming from Kuukai's mouth.

Kuukai sighed. "So now what?"

"Just get dressed for school, I don't wanna be late."

Kuukai looked startled. "How the fuck am I supposed to do that?!"

Amu stared at him. "Grow up, you have underwear on." Amu felt like a hypocrite, because she blushed when she was changing into Kuukai's school uniform. Who knew he was so muscular, and tall, and hot?

--

Amu and Kuukai walked to school together, which would've been really romantic if they were in their own bodies.

"I think I have a stomach ache," Kuukai said.

"Whatever, that's your fault," Amu snapped.

"Well, someone's angry," Kuukai said.

"Of course I'm angry! I'm a guy! And not just any guy, I'm _you!_ How are we going to do this?!" Amu said.

"Wait," Kuukai paused. He beamed, which looked weird on Amu's face. "Does that mean I'm special?"

"No, it doesn't mean you're special."

"I knew I was special!" Kuukai said as they started going closer to the school.

"You're not special, Kuukai," Amu paused when she saw some students at the corner of her eye. "I mean, erm, _Hinamori_." Amu wanted to laugh. It felt funny saying that.

"You're special, too." Kuukai gave Amu a hug. Surprisingly, Amu didn't blush, because it was like hugging herself. However…

"Uhh… _Hinamori_," Amu whispered.

"What?"

"People are staring…"

Kuukai let go, but it was too late. Sure enough, tons of students (mostly Kuukai's fangirls) were staring. Amu heard whispers of "What is Hinamori Amu doing to Kuukai-sama?!" and "That's not her character."

"Amu-chan," Ran whispered. "There they are!" Ran pointed to the former guardians, who were walking toward the school.

Amu nudged Kuukai. "Pretend to be me for a minute and call to them."

Kuukai nodded. "Tadase… kun! Nagihiko! Rima!"

The said three turned around.

Tadase smiled. "_Ohayo,_ Amu-chan."

"Congratulations on getting _Miru no Tamago_," Nagihiko said. His emotion changed in concern. "I heard you both touched the egg at the same time. Anything different."

"A lot more than you think," Amu said. "Come with me."

-Next to a special tree xD-

"A~_hem_," Amu coughed. "Erm, how do I put this…?"

"Uhhh," Kuukai thought. "Let's just say, that I'm not Amu."

"Yeah, and I'm not Kuukai," Amu said.

Rima sighed. "I knew something was different," she said quietly.

Kusu-kusu giggled. "Hee hee! Kuukai's a _girl_~!"

Daichi coughed. "It feels a little awkward on this side as well."

Rythme laughed. "Suckers…"

Miki just stared at him with lots and lots of admiration.

"Hmmmm," Nagihiko thought. "I'm pretty sure it's _Miru no Tamago_, though it's strange how you didn't," Naghiko paused. " 'Fall in love?'"

Kuukai felt really tired. "Hinamori, he said. I think I have a cramp."

Kusu-kusu broke out in hysterical laughter. "HEH HEH KUUKAI HAS A CRAMP!"

Amu raised her eyebrow. "Why would you have a cramp?" Then, Amu totally face palmed herself. "Of all days…"

"What?"

"Erm," Amu paused. "How should I put this?"

Rima sighed. "Let's just say… There are pads in the very front pocket of my backpack. Grab 'em, and run."

--

_**A/N:**_ Wellz? What did you think? xP This chappy wasn't as "Rated T" as I thought o.o The next one will be though… I'M SURE OF IT XD

Sooo yea… REVIEW OR IKUTO WILL COME TO YOUR HOUSE WITH A WATER GUN!!!


	3. Chapter 3

_**A/N:**_ Hi again ^^ Okay, for all the people who read my shugo chara dares thingy, gomenye~ but I deleted that one because I had a LOT of fanfics and I was WAYYY behind in my dares. Sooo I couldn't find enough time and stuff . IM SOOO SORRY

Anyway, I've been very pissed at my e-mail cuz I haven't been receiving fanfiction updates and stuff and when I showed my friend this fanfic I realized that it was updated even tho I didn't get an e-mail about it =(

Sooo yeahhhh… Enjoy ^^

Disclaimer: …really? Do I have to do it again? *sigh* I don't own

Warning: The following is very "rated T," viewer discrition is advised ~.0

--

"Kuukai's womanly issues," was what Rima called it whenever she was talking about that little time of the month thing that _really_ wasn't supposed to happen to him. Then, people would stare at him (or in this case, Amu who is in his body) and think that he was getting a sex change or something. At least, that was the latest awkward rumor.

It was just about (maybe even more) awkward than that one time when they were going on a trip and Kuukai had a plane seat next to Amu. She had fallen asleep and he was wide awake. That was when she started talking in her sleep (which happened a lot) and kept giggling and saying "Kuukai! Stop it, it tickles!" and then saying "Yes, I am very naughty." That just about caused Kuukai the biggest blood loss he's ever suffered. Especially when she rolled around way too much and caused herself to throw her very impressive rack onto him (which, by the way, was authentic. He should know, he checked).

Meanwhile, Amu was dealing with problems of her own. Not only was she attacked by mobs of girls that really wanted to ask him (or her in this case) out, which made her really mad for some darned reason, but she lost her prized possesion: her boobs that she worked so hard to grow. She couldn't help but wake up every morning saying "THEY'RE GONEEEE!!!" Unfortunately, she had Kuukai's man part…

But still, after a certain event, no one can really say that Amu has it worse…

It all started after school on the same day they transformed…

The bell rang and Rima stretched her arms. "That was a pretty good lesson today," Rima yawned. "I can't wait to go home and watch that new comedy. You wanna come, Amu-chan? Oh wait, I mean," Rima turned on her evil grin. "Kuukai-chan?"

Kuukai (who is in Amu's body =D) had his head down on the table (or Amu's head? You get it right?) and was muttering something along the lines of "I hate my life. I hate my life," and so on.

Amu (Kuukai's body) was also in their class because Rima and Amu skipped a grade in math, felt like crying. She was just lucky that Kuukai's parents and brothers weren't home so she could do her own thing without looking weird. But it's still depressing that she's in her friend's body.

They started walking toward their lockers at the end of the day, kinda hoping that things will get better. Think again, guys.

As soon as Amu reached Kuukai's locker, she was first attacked by his stalkers, I mean, admirers.

"Kuukai-sama! I made you cookies in cooking class!"

"Kuukai-sama! You look cool today!"

"Soma-kun!"

The screaming fangirls could've killed Amu's hearing, or Kuukai's hearing, not that it mattered, Kuukai would be the one who loses it when they switch back. Speaking of Kuukai…

He was just walking to Amu's locker with Rima when a perverted older student flipped his/her skirt from behind. Normally, he would either blush or laugh, but this was him he was talking about.

"So that's what it feels like!" Kuukai said.

Rima smacked her forehead.

--

Ah yes, that whole daily thing: The violin, the X eggs, the character transformations. That was when Kuukai's life was just about destroyed.

"Ikuto!" Amu (in Kuukai's body said).

Ikuto raised his eyebrows. After all, Kuukai normally called him Nishikiori (did I spell that right?).

"Nishikiori, we already got that Miru egg," Kuukai (in Amu's body) yawned. "Give it up already."

Ikuto stared at them. "Uhh…"

"Oh right," Amu let out a fake laugh. "Eheh, funny story. Well, you see, we switched bodies for some reason."

"Yeah…"

Ikuto stared at Kuukai. "Lucky bastard."

"What?" Kuukai looked down. "Oh this? Yeah I know."

"WHAT THE FUCK?!" Amu seriously wanted to kill them. "Kuukai! Rima! Now please?!"

"Oh yeah," Kuukai said. "_Ore no kokoro…_"

Rima swallowed her last laugh. "_Atashi no kokoro._"

Amu sighed. "_Atashi no kokoro._"

"UNLOCK!"

-one charanari/Character Transformation later-

"…"

"…"

Rima burst out in automatic laughter as Ikuto followed. "WHAT THE HECK? HAHAHA"

Amu looked at Kuukai and smiled. "That actually looks pretty good on my body. The whole 'Sky Jack' look. It's cool."

Kuukai stared. "WHAT THE HECK?! WHY AM I WEARING AMULET HEART'S _CHARANARI?_"

Amu looked down. Miki burst into laughter, and Suu sighed.

"I guess our _charanaris_ only work for actual person we are connected to," Suu sighed.

Miki kept laughing. "Hey, Rima-chan! Did you bring your cell phone camera?"

Rima looked through the pockets of her 'Clown Drop' outfit (if there are any pockets) and pulled out her cell phone. "Here you go."

With much effort and Suu's help, Miki picked up the cellphone. "Amu-chan! Say cheese!"

Amu thought for a minute. _Hmmm… I can either be a nice person and turn away from the camera… Or I can just look and smile…_

"Cheese!" Amu said, winking.

_Click!_

"F my life" Kuukai said.

"Anyway, back the to the whole battle thing?" Ikuto asked.

"Oh yeah," Rima put away her cell phone. "Okay, let's goo!"

--

_**A/N:**_ Okay, that was mostly a humor chappy and nothing really happened… But next chappy maybe a little more… Fluffy? I dunno, I just wanted to type this up xD Again, SORRY ABOUT THE DARES THING .

Review and stuff! Next time the story will actually make sense!


	4. Chapter 4

_**A/N:**_ HIII sorry for the really late update… Life sucks…

Anyway, first of all, last chapter I confused Ikuto's name xD Lawl, I think I pulled out "Nishkiori" from some other anime, but Ikuto's real name is "Tsukiyomi" xD Sorry~!

REVIEWS!!!

**T-chan: **Really =D ty!!! Here's the update =3

**ThatGirl96:** Lawl xD Ikuto is friggen love right?

**Blue-Cat-94:** Yayyy! X3 thanks for reviewing!!!

**Miss Aya-chan14:** Yay =3 I love making people laugh!! But it's not very succesful sometimes xD (I bet you I spelled that wrong…)

**onigiRimi: **thanks for reviewing =3 yea the whole japanese thing was totally random cuz my friend and I were having a Japanese contest xD

**bendercat:** LOL thanks for mentioning it xD when my friend and I were reading reviews, she was like "YOU SO FAIL" and started laughing xD

**pi-or-pie:** Lol yea. My friend drew a picture of it and I was like "twitch- Never show me that again D="

**ccppfan:** woo thanks x333

Okay… COMMENCE LE CHAPTER!!!

--

"I-I'm home!" Kuukai called nervously into the house.

"Hi, hon!" Amu's mother walked quickly down the hardwood staircase fixing her hair, She wore an expensive-looking black dress and a big black purse dangled on the crook of her arm. "Your dad and I will be going out tonight and will come back around midnight. Do you think you can babysit Ami-chan?"

"O-of course!" Kuukai said, trying to be as much like Amu as he can. Good luck, Kuukai.

"What's wrong?" Amu's mom looked at his face questioningly. "You're not thinking of inviting Ikuto-kun are you? I mean, I trust you two, but still…"

Kuukai heard nothing after that. All he could think of was "Wait WHAT?!"

"No!" Kuukai said, looking as surprised as he actually was.

Just as she was about to say something, a car horn sounded. "Okay," she said. "I'll be off, dinner's in the fridge." She stared at Kuukai's face searchingly.

Kuukai felt nervous under her stare, but was careful not to do anything suspicious, so he did what Amu did when she was putting on an act.

He cocked his head to the side cutely. "_Nani?_"

"Hm? Oh, nothing!" Amu's mother snapped back to Earth and dusted off her skirt before taking off. "Bye, hon!"

When Kuukai was sure she had gone, he let out a huge laugh. "HAHA! I NEVER KNEW THAT FELT SO STUPID!!!"

"Onee-chan?" A little girl with pigtails stuck her head out from behind the stairs.

Kuukai stared for a while before realizing who it was. "A-Ami!"

"Onee-chan, why were you laughing?" the little girl asked curiously.

"Because… uhhh…" Kuukai started searching through his imagination for something. "I.."

"Onee-chan!" Ami said, suddenly changing her mood. "What happened to Neko-kun?"

"…Neko-kun?" Kuukai repeated, relieved that he didn't have to make up an excuse. He had just realized what little imagination he had. Sad, sad boy…

"Neko-kun!" Ami said. "With the blue hair!"

Kuukai froze.

_DING DONG =D_

Ami was suddenly distracted (which, Kuukai noticed, happened very easily) and ran to the door. She used some stacked boxes to lift herself to little hole in the door. (Seriously, what's that called again o.o)

"Onee-chan! There's cool boy outside!" Ami said excitedly.

_Well, at least I know it's not "Neko-kun"_ Kuukai thought bitterly. He didn't bother looking through the little hole and swung the door open.

"Aa…" Kuukai trailed off as he saw Ami watching. "K-Kuukai! Hi!"

"Hinamori!" Amu said awkwardly. "Remember? I said I would tutor you?" Amu hinted.

"O-oh! Right!" Kuukai said.

Ami stared at Amu. Then, she cocked her head to the side in an imitation of her older sister. "Onee-chan, is this your boyfriend?"

"What?!" Both of them gasped. "No!"

Ami giggled. "Hee hee! Onee-chan has a boyfriend!" Ami twirled around on the smooth floor, wearing out her socks. "Don't worry, onee-chan!" Ami said reassuringly. "I won't tell mommy!"

"O-okay…" Kuukai said awkwardly.

Ami giggled and twirled away from the two.

When Ami was out of earshot, Kuukai glared at Amu. "_Neko-kun?!_"

Amu froze. "W-well, you see, there was a time in my life… And I kinda… Felt bad for Ikuto… So… I kinda let him stay in my room… But my mom figured out…"

"Dude!" Kuukai said. "This is _Tsukiyomi_ (_**A/N:**_ HA I GOT IT RIGHT!) _Ikuto!_ You know, you called him 'perverted neko' in fifth grade!"

"Y-yeah," Amu said nervously. "But I kinda was… You know… Back then…"

"How about now?" Kuukai raised his eyebrow suspiciously. "You were acting way too soft on him on that X-egg battle an hour ago."

"What?" Amu widened her eyes. "No! I used to, but now he's just a 'friend.'"

"What's with the ' '"? Kuukai said, doing that… thing you do when you say "Yeah, I really 'like' you."

"Nothing's going on!" Amu assured him. "Why do you care anyway? Do you like me or something?" Amu was just half teasing. The other half was more "WELL?! DO YOU?! I'VE BEEN WAITING YEARS FOR THE ANSWER!!!"

Kuukai let out the most realistic laugh he could. "Of course not!" Kuukai lied. Then, they both looked away from each other awkwardly.

"…"

"…"

And oddly enough, today was Tadagay- I mean, Tadase's birthday.

--

_**A/N:**_ …THAT SUCKED DIDN'T IT?! I'm sooo sorry… I did my best, but I'm suffering from writer's block, so if you have any ideas, please share x3

So yeah… REVIEW PLEASE!!! Or else… I'll make Tadase make-out with Amu xD

Amu: O.O WHAT?! But… He's Tadagay!

Me: Deal with it!

Amu: Please O.O


	5. Chapter 5

_**A/N:**_ Hi guys! Okay so you guys will probably be pleased to know that I am going to commit to this fanfic the most… In February, because January is like Hell's Month (with the finals and whatnot)… So after February there will be TONS of updates x333 I plan on finishing this fanfic by the end of 2010… So wish me luck!

Reviews:

**Bendercat:** YAY! TADAGAY IS GONE!!! But yeah, this is Kukaimu xD Personally, I don't mind Amuto either, 'cuz that looks like what's happening in the manga… But yar!

**pi-or-pie:** LOL that's a good idea xD maybe next chap I'll do that… *insert mischievous glint here* Because you know, every time there's an awkward moment, a gay baby is born…

**Courtney1033:** OMG Really?! I'm so sorry!!!! I'll try not to make you wait anymore! But life is so… MEH!

**xXNeonPurpleMoonXx:** Don't worry xD Now Amu is safe! I'll try to make this chappy SUPER long… Just kidding… I meant as long as I can make it… Last chapter was totally random because I felt bad I didn't update but I had nothing to write about… But I've got it now!

**Alerista:** Yeah… I tend to do that sometimes because there a _lot_ of Amuto friends and a lot of my friends are Amuto fangirls/boys (yes boys) so I wanna make it fair to them xD I'm my own Kukaimu group among my friends… But ya! Thanks for reviewing!

**PrOuD TuRtLe HuGgErS:** Yes she is xD I'd love to see Kukai and Ikuto fight over her though that'd be friggin awesome!

**Audelle:** OMG thanks for the criticism! Because I haven't been getting a lot of that and my friends are like "No everything's fine…" I think they're just trying to be nice… But I'll do my best this time! BTW, I'm a _huge_ fan of your fics! Just thought I'd let you know they're amazing!

**ThatGirl96:** Lol that happened with me. Cuz I have _two_ younger sisters… So I just combined both of their big mouths to one xD I was talking to my friend and they were like "OH EM GEE DO YOU LIKE HIM?!" And I was like "No xDDD" He was like "awwwww darnit..."

**GarrSaku:** Here's the update! Thanks for reviewing!!!

**Serentiy101:** OMG Thanks! X333 I really appreciate it! I think there should be more Kukaimu definitely! There is some but not enough humor… So that's what I'm here for! =D

**Kira161:** Yay! Thank you! Let's help the cause and get more people to write Kukaimu! =D

**Insertuntakenpennamehere:** Lol xD My friend got so used to it he gets confused at "Tadase" instead of "Tadagay" (yes HE) xDDD btw, love the penname =D

Wow lots o' reviews xD

Here it goes!

--

Kukai sighed nervously and tapped his shoe against Amu's hardwood floor. He leaned coolly against the wall and looked up the stairs leading to the second floor. Somewhere above him, he could hear little footsteps padding across the floor. Kukai looked at the clock, then back up at the stairs.

"Ami!" he called, trying to act like Amu as much as possible. "Hurry, I'll be late!"

"Okay!" she giggled. The said little girl ran down the stairs in her cute elementary school uniform. "Onee-chan! Can I go by myself?"

Kukai was tempted, but he knew Amu would kill him. "No, because Mama and Papa can't drive you today, so I'll drop you off at the door."

Ami looked disappointed that she missed her chance to be a "big girl." "Fine."

Kukai smiled and patted her head. "Good girl."

As they started to exit Amu's home, he saw himself leaning against the fence. He walked down the stone steps that would hurt if you tripped on it (he knows) and right up to himself. "Yo, wassup?"

The brown-haired boy jumped up, startled. "W-what was that?!" Amu shrieked.

"Iunno," Kukai said as Ami walked ahead of them down the street. He continued walking and Amu followed next to him. "I just said 'hi' then you freaked."

"O-oh," Amu said nervously. "It's nothing."

"Well, I didn't ask if it was 'something,'" he said plainly. "But now I know. What's up?"

Amu looked down at Kukai's green shoes. His face turned a deep scarlet that totally did not go with the green uniform. "Y-your brother's kinda cute…"

Kukai widened his eyes. "WOAH! Where did this come from?"

"W-well…" she said nervously, fidgeting with her fingers. "They're really funny… and cute…" Amu put her hands on "her face" and squealed.

"DUDE! NO!" Kukai facepalmed. "HOW MANY TIMES DID I TELL YOU NOT TO SQUEAL?"

Amu pouted and crossed her arms; making the people who walked quickly past them give her strange looks. "Well sorry! I can't help myself."

"Onee-chan! Onee-chan's boyfriend!" I distant high-pitched call caught Kukai and Amu's attention and they stopped on the pavement in front of a small preschool building,

Ami ran off the pavement and her footsteps softened as they padded from the gravel to the dirt. As she turned around to wave at them, she kicked up some dirt. She waved happily and ran toward the building.

Amu and Kukai waved back at her before looking back at each other and continuing the conversation. But as Kukai opened his mouth he was cut off by gasps nearby.

Amu and Kukai whirled around to see two girls glaring at Kukai. Both were wearing the same green middle school uniform. They were leaning close together and nodding every once and a while. They didn't seem to notice that Kukai and Amu were trying to eavesdrop. Everyone once in a while, Amu or Kukai or both heard "That Hinamori!... Not good enough… Souma-sama!"

Kukai and Amu turned back on their heels and started walking again, distancing themselves a little bit as they walked on so that no one would get any ideas. Then, they started walking faster, as if anxious about something. When they arrived on the soft green grass of the school, they sighed in relief.

"Erm…" Amu said. She pointed toward the right side of the middle school building. "I'll just… go to your homeroom."

Kukai put his hand behind his head and looked up. "Uh… Yeah…"

They both gave they're silent good-byes and walked in separate directions.

Kukai walked silently on the stone road, stopping every once and a while to glare at a couple third year guys who looked at "him" suggestively.

"Amu-chan!" a soft and quick voice ruined his moment of somewhat peace and he looked at Rima and Nagihiko as they walked toward him. Rima smirked snidely. "Oh, I'm sorry, I meant Kukai-_chan._"

"Shut up," Kukai said tiredly, getting a bit wary of her jokes.

Rima realized this and frowned. "Well, we're early and Hotori-san discovered something about the _tamago_. So let's go?"

Nagihiko looked around. "Where's Amu-chan?"

"She went to homeroom," Kukai answered.

Rima sighed. "Really? I'm too tired to walk some more. We'll tell her later."

Kukai shrugged, "Sure."

--

Amu was bright red the whole time on the way to homeroom, but kept silent. She waved every once in a while to Kukai's fangirls just to be nice, but shot them a death glare as they turned their backs.

Amu looked at Kukai's soccer ball watch and winced. "I-I'm early?" Amu put the back of her hand to her head and sighed in an attempt to relax. She felt her cheeks cool down again.

"How could they think me and Kukai are…" In an instant, her cheeks started to heat up. "Uwahh…" She rubbed her cheeks and sat back against the tall, cool tree behind her.

Suddenly, a head of blue hair popped upside down in front of her. "Yo."

"WAH!" Amu jumped up as Ikuto got back on his feet in front of her. "Ikuto! Wh-what are you doing here?!"

"Looking for you," Ikuto leaned in close to her.

"Ikuto," she grit her teeth and leaned back. "Doesn't it feel uncomfortable that leaning really close to Kukai's face?"

"No," Ikuto said plainly. "Because I know it's really you."

Amu crossed her arms. "Ikuto, look, I _don't_ like you! I mean, as a friend, yes, but not… like-like…"

Ikuto pouted. "Oh c'mon! You liked me a while ago!"

"A while ago!" Amu growled. "Look, I've moved on! I don't like you!" Amu started to walk away to avoid an awkward situation. Too late.

"Wait," Ikuto grabbed her arm. "Who is it? Is it little Prince?"

Amu shook her head. "Uh… No…"

"Long-haired blue guy?"

"No," Amu tried to shake her arm free, but it didn't seem to work. "Look, Iku-"

"Is it Souma?"

Amu turned bright red for the hundredth time that day. "Ikuto!" she said angrily, to avoid the question. "_Let. Me. Go!"_

Ikuto's eyes widened and he let go. "It is Souma!"

"N-no it's not!" Amu said, turning around so he wouldn't see her face. "Just leave me alone!" She walked as quickly as she could toward her intended destination, trying to keep her head low as her footsteps quickened.

Ikuto stared at the brown-haired boy power-walked down the stone pavement. The soft wind blew his hair and some leaves flew off the tree. The grass flattened a little and Ikuto brushed his hair out of his eyes. He looked up and smirked. "Yoru, we've got a new job."

-_Meanwhile…-_

A girl with dark black hair looked at the arguing boys and blushed as the blue haired boy inched closer to Kukai-sama.

"G-guys," she tugged on the sleeve of one of her friends to get the attention of all, which actually worked. She pointed toward the arguing boys as Blue grabbed Kukai-sama's wrist. "Does this mean… Kukai-sama is…?"

--

_**A/N:**_ I AM SO SORRY!!! Was that short again? This time, I _swear_ I'll update within the next two weeks or so! I'll at least update earlier than usual… So look forward to it X3

Oh… Wait finals… Okay I'll finish finals then I'll update the next week! So that's three weeks…

Anyway, you see that little button again? Yeah, click it and REVIEW!!!

[Insert threat here…] I can't think of anything today… JUST DO EET!!!

That's what she said =D

Shut up! (Yes I'm arguing with myself XD)


	6. Chapter 6

_**A/N:**_BOOO D= did I scare you? Yes? No? Well then… Anywho~ What is up? =3 I've almost finished finals so I thought "hey, why not?" and _voila!_ Oh wow, that's all I have for today o.o no long _**A/N**_.

**Reviews:**

**xXNeonPurpleMoonXx:** OMG Lucky! I want a new laptop… And yes, it's an update =D told you I'd update earlier

**:** who knows? Kukai may have been… Leaning that way Nah jk XD

**animeholic1:** "Think" or "Know?" XD nah because if he was then I couldn't pair him with Amu

**bendercat:** No Ikuto doesn't need to do that, they already think Kukai's gay XD he has other plans…

**iiPaNdaRaWrz:** (insert Kukai here) Kukai: O.O I'M NOT GAY! Amu: Really? I thought… okay…

**Alerista:** Yep! You got it pretty much correct XD sorry about shortness. But lately I've been on a roll so this will be _much_ longer!

**Emmoria:** Ah yes XD and you know, rumors spread like a wild fire XD

**Aki no chiaki:** Yeah sowwy, but it'll be MUCH longer this time! I swear! Thanks for reviewing!

**pi-or-pie:** Kukai: Yes… People should be calling me "sama" now… Amu: No. Me: x3 thx for reviewing!

**Mii-chan2804:** Soon it won't just be her… X3

**Kitty Katie:** Thank you!

Ohohoho~ Told you I'd update sooner. Get ready for some scene jumping…

--

Amu opened her mouth and delicately put the fork of mocha cake frosting into her mouth. She pulled it out (_**A/N:**_ THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID! …forgive me I've been greatly influenced by my friends…) and rested the fork over her lips, in deep thought.

-_FLASHBACK!-_

"_Wait," Amu raised her eyebrows. "So… This isn't normal?"_

_Tadase shook his head. "The former king was studying it and realized that the legends are true. We tested it on two elementary students."_

_Amu gasped in a girly fashion, making Kukai winced. She ignored him and continued. "That's horrible! Then they will never have _real_ feelings for each other!"_

_Tadase shook his head. "No, we found an instant cure, so that's why I wanted to talk to you. Since it works on them, it may be able to switch you back." Tadase pulled out a plate of mocha cake. "Here."_

"…_Cake?"_

"_Yeah."_

_Kukai rolled his eyes. "Sure… A mocha cake is going to the bodies of two people back to normal."_

_Nagihiko smiled, "Actually, believe it or not, the mocha mixture negates the switching affect."_

_Amu gazed at Nagihiko in awe, then down at the cake. "The creator of mocha cake is a genius."_

_Tadase picked up a fork and handed it to Kukai. "Uh, the thing is, you must share the fork."_

_Amu's eyes widened and she tried to hide her flush by shaking her head furiously. "No! That's like, indirect kissing! HELL NO!"_

_Kukai turned his head and she thought (hoped) she saw a quick pink tint appear on his cheeks. "It's just a fork. Just do it."_

_One indirect kiss later -3-_

"_Well, how do you feel?" Rima asked._

_Amu sighed, "Nothing."_

_Kukai paused. "Wait," everyone looked at him hopefully. "I feel something coming."_

_Amu's eyes lit up. 'Really?"_

"_Yeah!" Kukai's lips formed a wide smile. "It's, it's-" Kukai let out a huge belch that may have possible caused a earthquake with the magnitude of 9 in Antarctica. Outside of the room, someone shouted. "DUDE! WHOEVER JUST BURPED THAT BROKE THE WORLD RECORD!"_

"_Never mind it's just gas," Kukai frowned._

_Tadase sighed, "I guess it doesn't work on those already in love."_

_Kukai choked on the piece of cake he had just shoved in his mouth. Amu looked at him worriedly, because if he died, then her body died with him. When he stopped to take a breath, Amu turned back to Tadase. "What do you mean 'already in love'?"_

"_You can't fall in love if you're already in love," Tadase shrugged. "That was his theory."_

_Kukai recovered from his spasm and put on a fake smirk. "'Love?' Please. I don't love Hinamori."_

_Amu's heart fell and she bit her lip. "O-okay, well, whatever, let's go enjoy Tadase's party for now? I mean, it's not everyday your gay king earns a year."_

_Tadase raised an eyebrow. "Gay?"_

_Amu paused, seeing her blind mistake. "N-no! Not 'gay' I mean 'gae'."_

"_Oh."_

_-End Flashback-_

"Oi, _Kukai_," a pink-haired girl walked toward her and growled. "Don't put the fork to your lip like that, that's girly."

Amu took away the fork from her lip and rolled her eyes at him. "Yeah, whatever."

Kukai frowned. "Hinamori, did I do something wrong?" Kukai shook his head. "Can I just call you 'Amu'? It sounds better."

Amu's heart remained aching as it was. "Wh-whatever," she turned around and left toward the huge birthday cake that was not even halfway finished yet, but it will be soon. It was so good!

"Oi, A-" Kukai stopped himself before shouting out. "Kukai!"

"Hey! Hinamori!" a black-haired girl walked up toward Kukai bravely. "What do you think you're doing? Stop annoying him like that! It's enough that you're friends with him. Don't push it."

Normally, Amu would have been mad, but she just sighed and walked on.

"Well," Amu paused as she heard her own voice with an interesting edge to it, "how the hell would you know?" She turned around to see Kukai looking kind of annoyed with the fangirl for the first time she ever saw. Normally, he loves the attention.

The black haired girl rolled her eyes. "You don't know? Huh!" she walked away in disgust and Kukai just stared after her. He paused for a moment then bounded across the dark wood floor after Amu, who quickly noticed and continued walking as though she never noticed, but the food table crowd was in the way.

"Hin-Kukai!" he fumed. "What the hell is u-"

Before he could finish his sentence, a girl that Amu recognized to be the girl that gave her chocolate yesterday (she sold to some kid on the elementary school soccer team for five bucks) looked up to her with big eyes.

"Erm," Amu raised an eyebrow awkwardly. "Yeah?"

She tore her eyes painfully away. "I-it's okay. Even though we all love you as straight, we still care about you and support your decisions."

"…Huh?"

Kukai facepalmed. "I KNEW THIS WOULD HAPPEN EVENTUALLY!" Kukai glared at her. "What'd you do?"

She shrugged, not caring very much. "I don't know, I was acting like you as much as possible."

The girl looked a bit puzzled. "But… That blue-haired boy you were talking to, Kukai-sama… Erm…" She blushed a bright red then ran away.

"IKUTO? YOU WERE HANGING OUT WITH IKUTO?!" Kukai shook her furiously.

Amu glared at him. "Well, he's much better to hang out with than you! In fact he said he loved me! That's more th-" Amu stopped herself just on time. "Th…an amazing! I mean, I have not really… uhh… kind of… Had anybody told that to me before."

"Liar," Kukai smirked. "What was your real sentence?"

"Look. I'm just… A bit emotional right now," Amu sighed. "I can't tell you."

"Fine," Kukai looked around to see if anyone was listening. Oddly enough, nobody was really curious enough: The cake was that addicting. "Hinamori-"

Amu winced, "Kukai, don't call me 'Hinamori.' I don't like that."

Kukai grinned, happy to see that they have somewhat made up. "Okay, _Amu_." Kukai smiled, feeling that saying her real name felt best. "I think…that there's a guy out there that may be better than Ikuto. And he wants to make you happy. So…" Kukai's smile started to turn a bit awkward so he looked both ways, trying to find something to say. His eyes lit up. "LOOK IT'S A PUPPY!"

Amu giggled and looked to the side. "OH MY GOD IT _IS_ A PUPPY!" They both rushed toward the puppy and started petting it like there was no tomorrow. It was really soft.

"Happy bi-"

"SHUT UP! CAN'T YOU SEE WE'RE PETTING A PUPPY?!"

"…"

--

"Ikuto, _nya_," Yoru cocked his head to the side and played with his left cat ear. "Are you sure it's going to work out, _nya?_"

Ikuto leaned against the wall of the large house and fixed his tie. To his right, the window burst with light and if you look, you could see a huge cake and a bunch of people staring at a pink-haired girl and hazel haired boy petting a puppy.

He smirked and pulled at his collar to make it less tight around his neck. "Of course. This is in the unofficial guy rule book. 'Don't make advances on a guy's girlfriend or ex-girlfriend until that guy gets over that girl.' So if I make it look like Amu is with me, Souma can't make any advances from here on."

Yoru snickered and did a backward roll in the air. "That's just like you to think of something like that, _nya_."

Ikuto dusted off his jacket and smirked. "I'm brilliant if I do say so myself."

"…_nya_."

"…"

"Why do you keep straightening yourself up, _nya?_"

Ikuto wrinkled his nose and glared through the window that at the puppy. "Dogs make me uncomfortable."

Yoru nodded in understanding. "Got it, _nya_."

Ikuto sneezed. "Uh, actually, let's crash them tomorrow at their school."

"But don't you have to go to school, _nya?_"

"…What kind of shugo chara are you?"

"Oh right, _nya."_

--

"Bye bye puppy!" Kukai cooed in a girly voice. Amu coughed.

"So what, now its okay for you to be girly?"

Kukai raised an eyebrow. "Well, it's your body."

"Hey, Souma," a black haired boy that Amu recognized as the obnoxious upperclassman that hit on her while she was in her own body walked up to her with a smug expression on his face. "I heard someone on the team's willin' to 'lean that way' for you," he slapped Amu's shoulder in a somewhat friendly way.

Amu paused for a minute, unsure of what he was talking about, and then remembered the fangirl that asked her about Ikuto. Wait, but she was so sure- Someone was really watching?

Oh shit.

Kukai looked horrified for a moment and the black haired soccer player grinned at him, putting a hand on his shoulder. "Better not hang out with people like 'im, Hinamori. Find someone manlier," he gave Kukai a revolting wink and was about to walk away.

"Oh, like your mother?" Kukai smirked.

The boy froze, definitely unsure of what to say. A hot girl had just shot him down. What would you do?

"You heard me right, Misaki," Kukai said. "And what do you have against gays? What, are you in denial?"

"Burnnn," a group of boys watching near by burst out in insane laughter and from the side.

Misaki clenched his teeth angrily and smirked back at Amu. "What's this, Souma? Lettin' a girl stand up for ya, wimp?"

Amu bit her lip and shrugged. "You're getting owned pretty badly already by a girl. Why make the effort?"

Misaki clenched his fist. "Why you little-"

_BAM! BOOM! CRASH! OTHER SOUND EFFECTS!_

"…"

Amu brushed herself off and noticed Kukai's surprised look. "What? Didn't I tell you I took a karate class over the summer?"

Kukai grinned and raised a hand to give her a high five. "Remind me not to mess with you too much." Amu raised her hand and lunged it toward his, but Kukai turned it into a fist and put it next to her arm, moving the thumb in an awkward way. "AWKWARD SNAIL!!!"

"…"

Kukai drew back his hand hastily. "Sorry."

Amu smiled. "It's okay," she raised her hand for a real high five.

Kukai almost gave her a high five, but she turned it into a fist and put it on top of the palm of her free hand, moving the fingers of her free hand strangely. "AWKWARD OCTOPUS!"

Kukai glared and Amu returned the glare intently. They both raised they're hands and…

"MATING TURTLES!!!" they both put their hands on the back of their free hands and wiggled the fingers.

--

_**A/N:**_ Hmmmm I really don't know what to think of that… The high five thing was something my friends showed me and it really amused me =3

Ahaha… that wasn't as long as I expected, but that way I have more updates… Next time, if you want a really long one, then it may take a while to update… So tell me please~!

A~hem. Yeah, so this _is_ a Kukaimu fic in case anyone was wondering. I tried putting in fluff, but I guess that wasn't the best I've ever done XP I was going to put more with Ikuto and the sabotage, but after I wrote the Ikuto scene, I was stuck, but I'll think of something by next chapter! I promise!

Yes, review or… hee hee I've got a good one… I'LL FEED YORU TO THE PUPPY!

That's right… So review!


	7. Chapter 7

_**A/N:**_ Hi guys! Thx for reviewing again and all that shiz.

**Reviews:**

**Alerista:** Ahaha sorry about the high-five thing. It's just like… Have you ever had those times where you told your friend to high-five you and then you took your hand away so that they missed? Yeah. And the whole Ikuto thing will be cleared up eventually.

**xxROCKxx678:** Awww thanks! Eh… I actually can't remember how I came up with it, but I think it was when I asked my guy friends "what would you do if you were a girl?" So yeah =3

**xXNeonPurpleMoonXx:** Okay fine… *releases Yoru* I'll get him next time. But yeah, of course Kukai doesn't lean that way… Or else that'd be… odd o.o awkward? My friend wanted me to write a fanfic where Kukai _did_ lean that way XD

**Aki no chiaki:** Really? =D Thanks! Hopefully this one will be longer. I had it all planned out but then I forgot… So we'll have to see =3

**bendercat: **DANG IT! I'll get you next time, Yoru! Thanks for reviewing though! I like it when people laugh at my chapters =3

**strawberrygirl103:** Thanks soo much! X3

**pi-or-pie:** Thank you! The whole "mating turtles" thing is a thing where when you high five someone, and they miss and like… have you ever done those things? XD but yeah, mating turtles is one my friends taught me.

Okay, shall we start? =D This was all put together on a whim. I really have no idea what I'm doing… Oh, and I'm probably gonna take out the "Ikuto sabotaging everything" thing, because I cannot think of anything…

YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!

--

Ikuto brushed his blue hair out of his eyes and watched as the clouds floated by. The sun shone so brightly that day that Ikuto could've went blind if he looked straight at it. He took a deep breath and Yoru followed this action.

"…Ne, Ikuto, _nya_."

"What, Yoru?" Ikuto replied. He watched as a cloud floated by. It looked kinda like a unicorn with three legs.

"Aren't we supposed to go to Amu's school?" Yoru asked, rolling over to his side to face Ikuto.

"Actually, I've been thinking," Ikuto said calmly. "Maybe we should skip to plan B."

"…You're just too lazy to do plan A, _nya,_" Yoru said.

"Too right you are," Ikuto agreed, yawning. "How about we TP Souma's place?"

Yoru grinned and sat up. "That sounds fun, _nya!_"

"Right," Ikuto said dully. "Let's do it… tommorow…"

--

"So…" Amu said awkwardly, her head resting on the lunch table.

"So…" Kukai replied curiously, his head also on the table.

"What are we gonna do about the whole 'they think you're gay' thing?" Amu drummed her fingers on the tile of the table in a bored manner.

Kukai lifted his head. "I don't know! What would you do?"

Amu shrugged and put her hands over her head and (unawaringly) complained loudly, "I don't know! I'm not a guy!"

Kukai jumped up quickly and held a finger to lips. "SH!!! Amu!" he jerked his head toward a nearby table where a couple people were looking curiously.

"Sorry," Amu muttered. "Damn this! I hate being you!"

"Hey, how do you think I feel?! I'm having a _period!_" Kukai gritted his teeth as he said this and looked rather irritated. "I'm not supposed to get a period!"

Amu glared at him. "I'd rather get a period once a month than an erection every time I get turned on!" she whispered.

Kukai crossed his arms and looked away. "Sh-shut up!"

"No, you!" Amu said.

Amu and Kukai took a moment to glare at each other.

"Well?" Kukai asked, still a bit pissed.

"What?" Amu snapped.

"What are we gonna do about it?" Kukai sneered impatiently.

"I don't know," Amu, not so gently, placed her head on the table once again. She felt so helpless right now that she couldn't stand it.

"Here you go," Amu lifted her head when she heard a metalic "_clank_" from infront of her. Rima sat down next to her and put down her own lunch tray. "No need to thank me."

Amu, who had just opened her moth to thank her stopped dead, unsure of what to say. "…Okay…"

"How long do you think this is going to last?" Rima asked, concern in her voice for the first time since the two days Kukai and Amu had spent in their opposite bodies.

"I believe that Tadase is looking into that right now," Nagihiko took a seat at the table, too. His feminine face made Amu take a close look at him for the first time and think.

"What would you look like with guy-ish hair?" she asked suddenly.

He looked a bit surprised at the question for a minute, then smiled. "Like a boy."

"Well, no duh," Amu said. "But-"

The bell interrupted her random conversation and everyone around them had groaned about how their lunch times were unreasonably short and walked off to class.

"Dammit," Amu swore. She started to get up along with Rima, Nagihiko, and Kukai when she suddenly paused and turned to Kukai. "Uh… Kukai? Did I tell you that I'm supposed to have a job interview today?"

Kukai looked surprised for a moment before he slung Amu's backpack over his shoulder. He winced when he remembered how delicate her body was. "Job interview? You're only fourteen!"

"Yeah, but there's this one… place… that allows you to work at fourteen with parent permission… And I didn't want to depend on my parents _too_ much for clothing and unnecessary stuff… so… I'll meet with you after school and show you, okay?"

Kukai gave her a long, hard stare before nodding. "Okay then."

Amu seemed to have a look of relief on her face that made Kukai suspicious. He also saw that he looked rather… well… awesome when relieved. He know sees why all these girls fall for him. He'd fall for himself, too.

And at that, Amu waved to Kukai before continuing toward her next class. Kukai smiled in a girly way (he felt like throwing up right after) and walked in the opposite direction.

Nagihiko and Rima stared at their friends for a moment, then back at each other.

"How long, do you think, until they notice?" Nagihiko asked.

Rima opened her mouth to answer, but Kukai and Amu had already returned to the table.

"Right," Kukai muttered and brushed pink hair out of his eyes. He walked in the direction that Amu had come from and Amu walked Kukai's previous path.

"That's a new record," Rima said, amused. She took off after Kukai to their next class and Nagihiko followed Amu to Kukai's PE period.

--

Amu hated having PE in Kukai's body. It was harder to move around considering his body wasn't as flexible as hers was. On the bright side, his leg muscles were stronger and his body didn't tire out too easily from running, so jogging wasn't _too_ bad.

Amu slowly came to a stop on the track and walked off to the side. She wasn't panting as hard as she would in her own body, but she was still pretty tired. Nagihiko finished shortly after her and was panting more heavily that she was. He had a habit of taking things slowly and didn't do to well in jogging, but normally Kukai urged him run faster, and he would do so.

"So, A- Souma-kun," Nagihiko, much like Kukai, constantly forgot that Kukai and Amu had switched bodies, "what was that job that… Amu-chan was going to do?"

Amu bit her lip, unsure of whether to tell Nagihiko. But Nagihiko looked so much like Nadeshiko, it was difficult not to trust her (oh Amu, you poor, dense soul…). "…A maid café."

Nagihiko's eyes widened in surprise. "_What?!_" he lowered her voice so that the people finishing their jog wouldn't hear them. "You do know that Souma-kun would _refuse_ to do this? He wouldn't approve!"

Amu gave him a confused blink that most girls in the school found adorable. "Why would he care? I'm just working at a maid café. The worse thing there is the dress and the pervs, but I know karate!"

Nagihiko gave her a long look before sighing and patting her on the head. Luckily, no one was paying close enough attention to give them a weird look. "Some day, Amu-chan, you'll learn."

Amu stared blankly at him. "I'll learn what?"

Nagihiko smiled calmly, "It's not important at the moment. You'll find out eventually."

Amu's impatience began to rise. "I don't care if it's not important! I wanna know _now!_" She covered her mouth when she realized she sounded like a spoiled little kid. A few people turned around to search for the noise source, but they couldn't find it.

"You'll see," Nagihiko laughed, amused at Amu's impatience.

"DAMMIT, NAGIHIKO!"

--

Kukai stretched as the bell dismissed the last class of the day. He still hated biology. He was never too good at all this science and stuff. He had taken a small liking to Amu's body. Aside from those perverted things, he had realized that Amu's body was more flexible and somewhat easier to move it. He also found a skirt strangely comfortable (not that he was telling anyone that).

"Hey, Amu-chan," Kukai saw Rima holding in a laugh as she called him this.

"Way to be mature, Rima," Kukai rolled his eyes.

Rima frowned and narrowed her eyes at him. "Whatever. Here, take one so your stomach doesn't growl during the interview, You don't wanna embarrass Amu, do you?"

"No…" Kukai caught the bag of Goldfish snacks (The snack that smiles back!). He poured some into Amu's small palm and handed the bag back to Rima. He stared at it for a minute before grinning childishly. He shoved it into his mouth and chewed fiercely. "Rawrrr! I'm eating all the fish!" he took another one from Rima and held it over his mouth. "_Oh no! I don't wanna die!!!! Noooo!"_ he said this in the highest voice he can manage before dropping the fish into his open mouth.

"…Who's the immature one now?" Rima smirked.

"Sh-shut up!" Kukai turned a bright red when he realized he had just done this in public, in _Amu's_ body. Luckily, nobody heard him, so he relaxed.

"Hey, Hinamori!" Kukai turned and scowled at the captain of the basketball team (AKA the third cutest guy in the school). He had a group of girls watching him ravenously from a distance. Rima wouldn't have been surprised if one of them jumped on him and ate him right then and there. Why was he so popular? Well, he had this gorgeous black hair and blue eyes that seemed to hug you. But under that extreme handsomeness was a cold-hearted jerk.

"A-Akio-kun," Kukai said, smiling an entirely fake smile. He actually had an urge to stab this guy right there and then, but Amu wouldn't like that.

"So I was wondering," he put on a shy mask that made all the girls squeal. "Would you like… to go to the movies with me on Saturday?"

Ha, this was so fake. Kukai felt like giving him a good, hard punch and leaving. "Uh, I'm sorry…" Kukai wasn't exactly sure what to say to this, but he thought that would be clear enough.

"Oh, I guess they're right," Akio sighed, trying to capture the pity of the onlooking girls. "You are too good for me." He walked away, looking sad. "Well…"

"What the hell is wrong with you, Hinamori?" an girl stomped up to Kukai angrily and looked just about ready to slap him. "What is with your '_I'm better than you'_ attitude? I used to admire you for it in elementary school, but now you're just a straight-out _bitch!_"

"Yeah!" another girl joined the conversation, also looking upset. "Akio-kun is probably really upset right now! You just think that you're _better_ and only deserve the best? That's so selfish of you, Hinamori Amu!" After that, a bunch of girls stormed up to her and Kukai was unsure of what to do. Though he was rather angry that they would just come up to _his_ Amu (Talk about possesive…) and just insult her like that. And he was a bit nervous that Amu would be angry at him for tarnishing her reputation, so she pushed past the girls and (grudgingly) walked up to Usui Akio, trying to look as natural as possible.

"A-Actually, Akio-kun," Kukai said, trying not to grit his teeth and burst out laughing. "This Saturday, I-I meant that I didn't want to go to the movies… How about we go out to eat at a restaurant?"

Kukai wanted to scowl at Usui when he saw a faint smirk pass over the offending boy's face: he had just gotten what he wanted. "Okay, I'll call you tomorrow?"

"O-okay."

When Kukai realized what he had just done, he ran back into the now empty classroom (except Rima, who was waiting to see what was happening), took a meter stick, then attempted to hit his head as hard as he could with it.

"Wait!" Rima grabbed the stick from him before he could proceed. "This is Amu's body! Hit your own body! We don't care about that!"

Glad to see someone cares, right Kukai?

--

Amu waited for Kukai outside of the school gates. She leaned against the gate coolly, like she always did. She didn't have to worry about acting like Kukai at the moment because the way she stood when she waited was about the same as Kukai. She didn't wait that long before she saw Kukai running rather clumsily toward her.

When he finally approached her, he leaned against the metal gate, Amu's hand tightly wrapped around one of the bars. "GOD DANGIT! HOW DO YOU RUN IN THIS BODY! IT'S SO HEAVY!"

"Shut up!" Amu suddenly felt like the abusive husband as she imagined how a passerby would see this situation. "Look, are we going or not?"

"Fine…" Kukai gasped for a few more breaths before standing up straight. They traveled down the sidewalk to the bus stop, which wasn't very far from the school. As they boarded the bus, Amu whispered to Kukai to ignore the whistling from the boys from Seiyo High School. Kukai didn't need reminding, or so he told her when they took their seats on the filthy black chairs, he was pretty much used to it.

When they finally escaped the desperate high schoolers and made their way down to the "place," Kukai threw a fit.

"A MAID CAFÉ?!" Kukai looked furious and almost yelled. "_No!_ I don't approve!"

"Why do you care?" Amu growled. "I don't want to depend on my parents so much now that mom's job is in a fix!"

"But _here?!_"

"It was the nearest place I could find that would hire!" Amu grabbed her backpack from Kukai and angrily looked through it. "Here's the parent permission form and the application. Get in there and _do well!_ If I don't get the job, it's your fault!"

Kukai gingerly took the forms and sighed. "But I don't like the sound of other guys watching you in a short maid's outfit."

"'Other guys'?" Amu raised an eyebrow in confusion and Kukai quickly slapped himself. "HEY!"

"Oops, I didn't say anything," Kukai said nervously. He put one hand on the café's door knob. He paused and looked back at Amu, who just glared at him sternly.

"Make it quick, I'll be waiting out here."

Kukai frowned, "Right." He turned the door knob and walked inside.

Amu sighed. "I don't know _what's_ bothering him! It must be the period." All of a sudden, a ringing came from a cellphone. She searched her pocket to see that it wasn't Kukai's cell phone ringing. It was odd, since the ringtone was rather familiar. She looked up and down the street curiously for the source of the ringing until she realized that she still had her backpack. It must have been a text since the ringing had stopped rather abruptly. She searched her (now messy, thanks, Kukai) backpack for her cellphone and realized that she _had_ gotten a text. From Usui Akio-kun! Surprised, Amu opened her cellphone and read the test:

_Hinamori, on Saturday, how about I pick you up then we walk over to "Le Mignonne Restaurant?"_

Amu stared at the text blankly for a minute before wanting to hurl it at the maid café's brick wall. That Kukai was so _dead!_

--

_**A/N:**_ Okay… So I haven't been updating again… I'm sorry DX I'll try to update more often, but I've been getting so many ideas for the other stories it's a wonder how I even get anything done… Either way, was that long enough this time? And I'm sorry to those of you looking forward to Ikuto DX but I was stuck at that point and was like "…Shit." _And_ this wasn't the best chapter ever… I'm sorry… PLEASE FORGIVE MEEE! *gets down on hands a knees*

Either way, please review this crappy chappy (IT RHYMES!!) or… *buffering…* IKUTO WILL BE THE SACRIFICE INSTEAD OF TADASE WHEN THE ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE COMES!

Ikuto: *tied up, with mouth taped* mmph!

Tadase: *also tied up* at least we're together =D

Ikuto: MMPHH! *freaks out*

That's right! REVIEW!


	8. Chapter 8

_**A/N:**_ HI EVERYONE! Wow… We're so close to 100 reviews and it's been almost a year since I started this fic =') Thanks for all your support X333

Actually, one of my friends read this and was like "…Why is it so awkward?"

…I really don't know o.o

**REVIEWS:**

**strawberrygirl103:** Awww thank youz! And sorry for late updates DX

**Sharksdop:** Yes it is =D I think it still is, and I've been getting huge idea explosions, so it might move up =3

**pi-or-pie:** LOL Really? =D Thankss! I'll try to update the Ouran one soon, but I have to finish a fic first

**Madmae16:** I know right? =D It's my plot for taking over the world…

**:** OMG SERIOUSLY? Lucky DX I wish I had a twin…

**stawberry fan:** Oh you know =D when the world ends and zombies come out of the ground to kill us all =w= And Amu has discovered her feelings =3 She's just a bit stubborn about it

**Xx Sakura Love xX:** IKR? D= There's not enough Kukamu in the world (Lol I thought that was a funny word too XD) And sorry DX I suck at descriptions, but I shall try my best =)

**mitsukiangel:** Don't worry… Ikuto got away- I mean I released him =D yesterday ahahahaha

**KidTantei:** Really? =D I thought it sucked… Thank you X3

**YoruichiKittyCat16:** Thank you sooo much X3

**Cocoatd:** Okay I will =D

**Pucca-chan:** Actually, that's a good idea =D I'll think of it! Thanks for the support!

**kitty kat:** Yay! Thank you!

**Princess TMR:** Don't worry, I already performed the sacrificial dance and released Ikuto =D NO WORRIES!

And that's all X3 My page breaks have been disappearing so I have a new one.

Enjoy desu!

_**-TheNextAliceOwO-**_

Kukai looked at himself in the vanity mirror and turned a bright red. He liked how this outfit looked on him, but his frown only deepened. He hated the fact that (technically) Amu would be prancing around in this café while perverted men stared at her bare skin. It was sickening.

"Okay, Hinamori-san," Kukai turned toward a girl with a model-like figure and bright blue hair. "If you have no one to serve, you greet the person who comes in with 'Welcome, sir' or 'Welcome, madam' and you must smile all the time."

Kukai winced at the aura the girl was giving off. He leaned back against the white vanity and drummed his fingers impatiently on the smooth wood.

"And," the girl continued, "it is most likely that the 'masters' will call you some nickname." The girl narrowed her eyes at Kukai suspiciously. "I don't like 'Hinamori,' it's too formal. And 'Amu-chan' is just stupid."

Kukai bared his teeth. "I think 'Amu' is a great name."

"Contradicting me, are we?' the girl stepped forward and inched toward his face. Kukai leaned back so far that the back of his head hit the mirror. "Might I remind you that I am the manager's niece?"

"Right," Kukai said, a bead of sweat rolling down his neck as the girl stared him down. "Sorry, Suzuki Ai-san."

"_Suzuki-sama_ should do it," the girl returned to her normal standing position and turned. "Your break is in two hours and lasts ten minutes. You get off at seven, Hina-chan."

"'_Hina-chan?'"_ Kukai repeated his name in disbelief and resisted the urge to kick her with his heavy boots.

Without another word, Suzuki walked out the door, her head held high.

Kukai sighed and walked steadily toward the main room of the café. His eyes slowly gazed around the room. The dark floor was so clean that he could almost see himself it it. The small round tables were able to fit four people each and contained an odd elegance, probably because they were a clean, marble white. The chairs looked soft and comfortable, and large flowers decorated wherever it was bare of furniture. There was a fireplace that was not currently burning anything, considering it was hot that day. About five other girls aside from Suzuki were walking around, taking orders and smiling as if it were nothing.

He heard the glass door open and saw three fifteen-year-old boy come in. They looked a bit creepy and Kukai had expected that these types of people would be here. He took a deep breath and clicked his boots over to them.

"Welcome, sir," he said, trying to put on his best smile. "I'm H-Hina-chan and I will be your maid today."

"Hina-chan, huh?" one of the guys gave him a suggestive look and smirked.

"Yes," his smile started to become more forced as he lead them to the empty table. He handed them their menus and started to walk off when one of them decided it would be fun to slap his ass.

This was the gayest job ever.

_**-TheNextAlice-**_

Amu felt herself jerk awake and she frantically looked around the room. Her eyes quickly scanned the green walls and the posters of famous bands from America plastered all over the wall. She slid her hand off small desk and onto the soft fabric on the chair's arm rest. She leaned back and spun on the chair for a while before returning to the desk. With her left hand, she grabbed the pencil and stared at the problem for a while before continuing her work. She was normally right handed, but, for whatever reason, Kukai's body was more accustomed to being left handed and she had easily adapted to this ability. She found it rather interesting that she couldn't write with her right hand anymore, but it was pretty annoying at times. Once, she had forgotten she was no longer right handed and became irritated while writing her test. Or… Kukai's test. He should've thanked her for that hard-earned "A."

Kukai, however, gave her a "C-" on that test.

Amu grit her teeth angrily at that memory. "WAH! BAKA!" she crumpled up the homework she was working on and threw it into the trash bin across the room. It landed in perfectly.

She smiled contently and turned back toward the desk. Her aim and strength have gotten better since she entered Kukai's body, which made her very satisfied.

She opened the laptop that lay at the bottom of a pile of shoujo manga that Amu had lent Kukai a few weeks ago, trying to help him get in touch with his feminine side. He never touched the books.

_Zzt… Zzt…_ Amu's eyes turned toward the black cell phone, vibrating on the side of the desk. But the vibrations stopped quickly, so it was just a text message. Amu reached for it, a bit hesitant. What if Kukai gets angry with her? She doesn't want that. But, she was just so curious.

_Well,_ Amu flipped the phone open, _one message won't hurt._

_**Sender: Hoshino Utau**_

_**Msg: Are we still up for Friday?**_

"Friday…?" Amu muttered to herself. Her curiousity was overwhelming and she found herself reading his inbox.

_**I love you…**_

_**I want to see you…**_

Amu bit her lip as she read through the messages. All of them. From Hoshino Utau.

"What the hell?" Amu looked through his outbox.

_**I miss you =)**_

_**How's work going? Do you think we could meet up when you get off?**_

_**You're coming back from England in three weeks right? The Friday you come back, wanna go out for ramen?**_

Amu felt her eyes fill with a blinding water as she threw the cell phone against the wall. She sank to her knees as the phone fell and collided with the floor, breaking into three separate pieces.

_Dammit,_ Amu thought, blinking through her tears. Why was she being such a drama queen? She promised she would never turn into those girls who throw themselves away when faced with unrequited love.

Amu collapsed onto the floor and wiped her eyes, looking up at the blurred ceiling fan above her. _So,_ Amu thought to herself, _he really does have a girlfriend. No wonder he's been so distracted these past weeks._

Amu coughed and rolled over. "I hate this." Amu hiccuped, "But… I knew it, didn't I?" Amu proceeded to roll over onto her stomach, facing the wall where the phone had crashed. She began to wonder why she even cared. It wasn't like they were dating, but her emotions were so stupid.

Her eyelids had become heavy, which had always happened when she cried. Her eyes rested on the phone. "He'll be mad at me, won't he?" she asked no one in particular. "Maybe, if I sleep… This will all be a dream…"

_**-TheNextAliceOwO-**_

Kukai felt a bit guilty toward Amu's parents for lying to them. He had told them he was staying over at Rima's. But in reality, he had come to his real home to check on Amu and complain about his stupid ass job.

He carefully unlocked the door with the spare key he kept under the flower pot and looked in, the house was empty. It was expected, since his family was out of town for his brother's game in Osaka.

"OI! AMU!" he called. He received no answer and became worried. He quickly walked over the the stairs and ran up them. "HINAMORI AMU! IF YOU DON'T ANSWER ME I'LL TELL EVERYONE YOU-" Kukai stopped dead as he stepped into his own doorway. His eyes froze over his own body, collapsed on cold floor. He kneeled down and started to shake her. "AMU!"

"Hn…" she answered calmly and Kukai relaxed. Good, she wasn't hurt or anything. The soccer team in their rival school was pretty angry at him for beating them in the last game, so he was afraid they held an invasion or something. He put her against the wall, where she blinked drowsily.

"Amu, you okay?" Kukai asked.

Amu wiped her eyes and sighed. Kukai watched her eyes stare blankly at him and saw her mutter something.

"What?"

"Nothing," she said. He was a bit surprised—he had never seen her so depressed.

"You sure?"

"Yes, I'm fine…" Amu blinked a couple times and looked back up at him. "So, how was work?"

At that moment, Kukai's brain had froze. He flickered through his memories of work and, when he gained control again, he lowered his head, feeling extremely depressed. He slowly slid to the floor and ended up facedown on the floor.

"That bad, huh?" he turned his head to the side to see Amu looking down at him.

"Yes…" he whimpered.

Amu sighed and put her head down next to his, but facing opposite of the wall he was facing (in other words, the other wall T.T). They both turned so that their eyes met. Kukai couldn't help but feel that, even though he was looking in his own eyes, they had a hint of Amu that made him forget she wasn't in her own body.

"Kukai," she sighed quietly, beckoning him from his thoughts, "our lives suck, don't they?"

"Yeah," Kukai breathed. "They do."

Kukai saw a small glint in Amu's eyes and felt an amazing happiness to see that she wasn't as depressed anymore. His lungs seemed to slow down his breathing and he let himself smile a bit.

"Oh well," Amu smiled a bit, "I'm just glad I'm not going through it alone. Thanks for being there."

Kukai didn't reply, or it was more like he couldn't. He suddenly pushed himself off the ground and gasped for air.

Amu got up, looking alarmed. "Kukai! Are you alright?"

"GOD… DANG… IT!" Kukai coughed. "HOW DO YOU BREATHE WITH THESE… THESE… THINGS?" Kukai emphasized on "things" as if he were disgusted and he pointed to his chest.

Amu gave him a stare that read "Isn't it obvious?"

"That's why girls don't normally sleep like that…" Amu said. "Isn't it obvious?"

"…Oh…"

Amu pat his head as if he were an innocent little child. "You need work," she got up and stretched. "I'm gonna go make dinner, wanna help?"

"Yeah, sure, just a sec," he saw Amu leave from the corner of his eye. He gazed around the room, only thinking about how wonderful it was to be back at his own house. He took a step forward towards the window to pull the curtains in, since it was getting pretty dark outside, when his foot stepped on something sharp.

"WHAT THE HELL?" Kukai yelled in pain, hopping around on one foot. He looked down and his eyes widened at the broken fragments that were scattered on the floor. "Holy crap, my cell phone!"

"Kukai? You okay?" Amu peeked into the room and froze.

Kukai raised an eyebrow at her. "So, Amu, what in sane _hell_ happened to my cell phone?"

Amu slowly looked from Kukai's face, down to the pieces. Before Kukai could react, she had run for it, screaming "YOU'LL NEVER CATCH ME ALIVE!"

Kukai, who's foot was still in pain, started hopping after her on one foot. "Aw, _hell_ no!"

_**-TheNextAliceOwO-**_

_**A/N:**_ Woah, I guess I did die and come back to life… Either way, if you found this chapter utterly disappointing, I don't blame you. I had my friends read it for me and tell me if it was alright and they were like "it's funny" or "it's cute" and I don't believe them… Really, my description this chapter is horrible and I may have to read up on some Harry Potter to improve… (JK Rowling's way of writing is really beautiful, don'tcha think? =D)

Oh, and if you came across any grammar mistakes, don't worry. I didn't get it beta-ed because I wanted to update ASAP!

Anyway, please please PLEASE review! And critique is highly appreciated! Thanks!


	9. Chapter 9

_**A/N:**_ Oh my… It's been a few months now, hasn't it? I sincerely apologize. Ever since school started, I've been bombarded with work, what with AP and Honors classes (not the smartest choice I've ever made). I'll still try to update every so often, but I'm beginning to lose my interest in Shugo Chara. :(

Don't worry, I probably won't drop this story, since my friend will kill me if I did. But it may be either suckish or have slow updates. I BE SO SOWWY!

**Re-da-views**

**bendercat:** Ahahaha. Sorry, that part was pretty confusing huh? I think I overdid the description there XP But thanks! :3

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**Sharksdop:** LOL Thanks. :P

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**pi-or-pie:** Thanks :DD Here's another (hopefully) good job after a very long time :3

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**xXNeonPurpleMoonXx:** Thanks. :3 Did you watch the Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Movie yet?

**:** Yayy! :D Thank yew~

**Kira Acumichi:** Hehee :3 Thanks~

**Strawberry lovee:** Thanks :D More drama it is. I'll try my bestiest (I know that's not proper English XP).

**someunknownguywitnonameoooo:** OMG WHUUU D:

**xcookiemonster101x:** LOL thanksies~

**strawberrygirl103:** Thanks! :D

**KekoNeko:** In all honesty, I think it was, too. :( I was really lost. I hope I can do better this time!

**addimison2:** THANKS!

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**Tigerfighter98:** Thanks :D I'm guessing this isn't soon enough though. D:

**DISCLAIMER:** Ohohohoh! In fact I do… not own Shugo Chara. Which is actually really disappointing… to me.

_**-TheNextAliceOwO-**_

After a few days at it, Kukai didn't really hate this job. Okay, sure the other girl's are complete snobs, and maybe he is kind of tired of the other perverted guys… But maybe that last statement was a bit contradictory. Actually, on second thought, he does have the decency to close his eyes in the changing room, so never mind.

He had to say, skirts were extremely comfortable and easy to move in. If he were not to be labeled as a (ahem) "fag," he'd wear a skirt every day… Not that he'd tell Amu that. Just saying.

Kukai also had to say, he was quite the actor. Especially when it came to acting all cute and bubbly and stuff. If Amu doesn't get a pay rise, he'd be well darned.

"Hina-chan! Where's our lemonade?"

"I'm coming~!" Kukai said. He then snickered in an ungirly manner as he watched the customers drool over him. Okay, don't think anything. There's a reason:

As Kukai came over with the tray, he saw various customers look over him as he walked as daintily as possible with the tray. That was kinda gross, until he saw that the other "maids" were looking over at him with great contempt darkening their faces. He was obviously stealing the bulk of the attention from them. And for some reason, these racy girls liked such perverted attention.

As he served the lemonade, trying not to wince as the customers' drool plopped onto the table, he heard the door click open.

"Welcome, sir!" he heard one of the girls say, and then this was accompanyed by very loud giggles and whispers.

Kukai turned around to see his original brown hair and school uniform walking in.

"A- Kukai! What're you doin' here?" he asked.

"Step aside, whore," a maid glared at him and whispered in a threatening tone. "I called him first."

"And he's not interested," Kukai rolled his eyes as the girl seated Amu.

"Hello," the girls slurred her voice slightly and ran her finger around the rim of the table, trying (and failing) to be seductive. "What would you like?"

"Uh…" Kukai had to refrain from laughing as Amu gave the girl a weird look and then looked over the menu. "Fruit parfait, I guess."

"Comin' right up," the girl winked at her and turned to leave. Kukai and Amu's eyes met and Amu mimed vomiting.

"Hina-chan!"

"Coming!" Kukai said as femininly as possible. As he walked over to a group of his drooling fanboys. _Idiots._

"Hina-chan," one of them spoke up as Kukai refilled the glasses of water. "Hiro here says he knows ya from school."

_Hiro? Who the hell is-_ Kukai looked up to see a boy with black hair and green eyes. He recognized him as the boy he had heard Amu and Rima talking and giggling about a few months ago. _Oh… Hiro._

"Hiro-kun," Kukai said with a forced smile. "Hi."

"Amu-chan," the boy smiled at him. "They told me about a 'Hina-chan' who's really cute. I figured it'd be you."

"Oh," Kukai had to resist the impending urge to whack this womanizer on the side of his head. "D-do you want anything?"

"No, it's okay," Hiro flashed him a smile that made him want to throw up. "Seeing you here was enough."

_Little son of a-_

"Hina-chan!"

Kukai turned around to another group of idiot fanboys. "Coming!"

_**-TheNextAliceOwO-**_

"Bye," Kukai said to his co-workers.

"GO DIE!"

Kukai snickered at their lack of ability to give him a good insult that he _can't_ reply to as he left and turned to see Amu waiting for him at the door.

"What were you talking to Hiro-kun about?" Amu asked eagerly. "That's been bothering me for _hours!_"

"It's only been one hour since you left the café," Kukai said, his amusement ebbing away as Amu questioned him more. Yet, Amu didn't seem to detect his sudden stony expression.

Amu squealed (luckily, the sidewalk was empty, so no one stared), "He's really cute, isn't he?"

"I wouldn't know, considering I'm… a dude," Kukai rolled his eyes.

Amu quickened her pace and walked backwards in front of him. "You know, Rima and I were talking about him the other day."

"No really? I never would've guessed that the 'Hiro' you and Rima were squealing about was the one you're squealing about right now."

"He's really nice, too! And latest rumor is that he broke up with his girlfriend two months ago!" Amu giggled, ignoring Kukai's sarcastic remark.

"So, what, do you like him or something?" Kukai said, his irritation growing.

"What?" Amu turned bright red and stopped. "I-I don't-"

"Like hell you aren't!" Kukai said furiously, unable to control his anger at this point. "I can't believe you would even fall for that man-slut! You're a handful! Hell, you can't even live in my body correctly! First people think I'm gay, what next? There's nothing worse than that unless you decide to make me a transvestite!"

"What the hell are you yelling about?" Amu snapped at him, obviously surprised at his sudden lash of temper. "Besides—it's not like you've done anything to my reputation! Because of you, I've been viewed as a little slut! I've seen it! The other first year girls look at me as if I'm stupid! Your stupid bubbly act is annoying! You know what, I don't have to 'act' gay! You do it well enough! I hate you!"

That last comment pained Kukai the most, yet he found himself talking back at her. "If you hate me so much, why not go run to Ikuto, or your dear 'Hiro-kun'!"

"You know what," Amu said steadily. "When I get my body back, maybe I _will_." Amu stormed off, running way ahead of him on the sidewalk. Kukai stood there and watched her, feeling as if he had made a huge mistake. But, it wasn't all his fault. If she hadn't started talking about that moron Hiro…

Kukai sighed and walked, adjusting Amu's schoolbag so that it rested comfortably on his shoulder. As he passed the window of a closed store, he looked at his reflection to see Amu looking back at him.

He facepalmed. "Dammit, we switched roles again!"

_**-TheNextAliceOwO-**_

"Let's see how he likes _this!_" Amu said, scribbling mustaches onto every picture of him that she could find in his photo album.

"Amu-chan," Ran leaned over her shoulder, watching as Amu as she killed the tip of her pencil. "Do you think, maybe you're overreacting?"

"Miki! Pencil sharpener!" Amu said furiously, ignoring Ran's question.

Miki frowned, but handed her the little green sharpener nevertheless. Amu snatched it and started drilling the pencil into it furiously, pencil shavings dropping onto her lap.

"It's useless, we can't get through to her," Dia sighed.

"Amu-chan, it's getting late," Suu nudged Amu's shoulder. "You don't want Kukai's body to become worn out, do you?"

"I don't care," Amu said. "It's his body. If he's so worried that I'm making his reputation bad, he can just _suck it_!"

"Well, you'll get tired, too, you know," Suu sighed. Her little guardian characters drifted towards their eggs, which Amu had put on Kukai's desk. "Just remember to get some sleep."

Amu didn't reply, but flipped furiously through the album. "Dammit, where are all his pictures?" Suddenly, Amu was greeted by an image of Kukai's messy brown hair. "Ahah!" She lowered her pencil, but stopped right before she could hit the picture. Amu suddenly realized what she was looking at.

"Hold on…" Amu whispered. "Why…?" Amu stared at a picture of her younger self, who latched herself onto Kukai's arm and seemed to be leading him through a school festival. She looked at the next page: Amu and Kukai were posing for a picture with cat ears. _Flip!_ Kukai and Amu trying to scoop fish.

Amu flipped back to the front of the album. It was all pictures of her and (newly mustached) Kukai. And on occasion, just pictures of her.

"Aw, dammit, Kukai," Amu sighed. "Why do you have to make things harder for me to understand?" She flipped her pencil and began erasing the many pictures she had mustached.

She suddenly felt her pocket vibrate and removed Kukai's cellphone (newly replaced courtesy of Amu's piggy bank). She had gotten a text from none other than Hoshino Utau.

_**Do you want to go out to ramen tomorrow? It's a Saturday.**_

Amu stared at it for a minute, then back at the album. This may be the only way to discover the answers to her questions…

_**Sure, I'll be there.**_

_**-TheNextAliceOwO-**_

Amu peered into the ramen shop, trying to keep as calm as possible. She spotted Utau almost instantly—who else wears sunglasses indoors, has hair as long as her and wears short-shorts in the winter? Exactly.

"Amu!" Utau made a motion at the stool next to her. Surprised, Amu joined Utau abd settled in.

"What'd you like, young man?"

"Kukai normally has shoyu ramen," Utau said to the man, who nodded and walked off to prepare the ramen.

Amu stared at her in wonder. "How'd you know…?"

"Ikuto explained it to me when I came back from my tour," Utau said, blowing on her noodles.

"Oh," Amu said, relieved that she wouldn't have to roll out the entire story. The bowl of ramen appeared in front of her and Amu began to eat.

"You know, if Ikuto didn't explain anything to me, I wouldn't have guessed that you were in Kukai's body," Utau said in an amused manner.

"Huh?" Amu stopped and noticed that she was sitting with her legs spread apart as opposed to Utau's crossed legs. 'Oh," Amu shrugged. Amu put down her chopsticks temporarily and looked at Utau with as straight of a face as she could manage.

"Excuse me if I'm prying, but what's your relationship with Kukai?" Amu asked cautiously, knowing how angry Utau could get when she was offended.

Utau stopped in the middle of a long stream of noodles and peered at Amu over her sunglasses. When Utau finished eating, she began to giggle a bit. "I knew you'd ask me that—don't worry. Kukai and I were together for a while, but we realized that our relationship was more of a friendship than anything else."

Amu let out a sigh of relief before she could stop herself.

"So you are interested in him, aren't you?" Utau smiled at her.

"I- um…" Amu looked around nervously before beginning to eat more ramen to cover up.

"Don't worry, I know more about you two than you guys do," Utau said. "In fact—that was one of the reasons we broke up. I could see it in his eyes when he looked at you or talked about you. And you, too. Whenever you would talk about another stupid thing he's done in school, you'd looks so happy, as if he's all you want to talk about. You always claimed to like my Onii-chan,but I doubted it," Utau spun a bit in her stool out of boredom.

"He… He talked about me?" Amu asked hesitantly.

"Excessively," Utau smiled.

"So… Does he…?" Amu said, aware that she was beginning to allow an unsightly feminine blush to appear on Kukai's face.

"That's something you have to figure out yourself," Utau sighed. "But I'm surprised you haven't figured it out months ago. Honestly, you're so dense—I don't' even know why Onii-chan's interested in you sometimes."

Amu was in silent thought for a minute. She had just finished her ramen when Utau had gotten a call.

"Look, I have to go now," Utau sighed. "Don't do anything rash, got it? Everything will show itself soon." Utau put the tip on the table as she and Amu left the shop together.

"Thanks," Amu said as Utau turned the other way.

"I'm only helping Kukai," Utau said, not turning back. "I'm not concerned about you in any way." Amu watched as Utau walked towards a limo that was parked not too far away.

"Whatever you say," Amu smiled before turning and walking off. Maybe… Just maybe… An apology is in order.

_**-TheNextAliceOwO-**_

_**A/N:**_ Yay! Finished! Okay, I'll try to get to the next chappy ASAP, since I've been getting a bunch of idea explosions since… right now. Seriously. The only problem is the obvious: school. I'll try my best though! :3

So review! Or else I'll make Utau dump an entire bowl of ramen onto Ikuto's precious hair!

Utau: Why the hell am I in this?

Me: Because… I told you… to?

Utau: Screw you, I'm leaving.

Me: …Please review? :3 I'll give you huggles~ And happy new year's eve! :3 I hope you have a good one!


	10. Announcement!

_**ANOUNCEMENT!**_

For those of you who actually follow my fanfics, I'm sorry to say that I'm leaving this account and planning on starting fresh at some point. I feel like there's just no motivation with this account and I want to start anew in order to sort things out and move on from past fandoms. Therfore, I will be discontinuing many of the fanfics on here. Sorry

However, if time allows it, I will be continuing some fics such as _Eighth __Time__'__s __a __Charm_ and completely rewriting a fic or two, like _The __Piratical __Adventures __of __Alice __Kirkland_, although it probably won't have the same title anymore.

I hope you guys understand! :) Thanks for the run, I really appreciated it! I might post a link to my new account once I make it, so yeah. It was nice to have you guys reading my stories, and I hope I see some of you on my new account!


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